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Gratuitously Nasty
The other day I was out with a new friend. She had invited me to her home which I had never seen before (it was spectacular by the way) and introduced me to a web designer doing some work for her on a project. He was a nice kid, very young, and when he found out what I do he was interested. Being a student, he needed a ride home after he finished and as we were going out for lunch anyway, he hitched a ride.
Along the way he started to share with me his new venture and I was politely listening. I actually didn’t think it was much of a company but as he and I would likely never see each other again and also he was not asking my advice (just bragging a little to impress me), I just listened. Well, it wasn’t long before he evidently contradicted something factual that he had told my new friend and she proceeded to jump down his throat and essentially gut him right there in front of me. There was just no good reason for this.
This little event brings to mind something that I have seen a lot of in my career, namely gratuitous nastiness to employees and underlings. It is always either the result of an ego driven maniac who gets his or her jollies by demeaning staff or by a thoughtless self-involvement by the perpetrator. I know; I have fallen into this myself.
Back in the beginning of my career (before electricity) I worked for a company and had a secretary performing some marketing tasks for me. I was called into my boss’s office where he privately dressed me down for putting the woman into tears. For the life of me I had absolutely no recollection of doing anything remotely unpleasant, but thanks to my perceptive employer I was told how I did it in a way that I could both hear and understand. You see, it was not that I intentionally attacked her. I just treated her without regard and like a piece of furniture. This made her feel used and abused. She was right.
The point of both of these examples is that there is absolutely no good reason to treat staff like manure, intentionally or not. Ignorance is not an excuse as it is just a cover up for self-centered behavior. Further, just because you are the boss does not make you the dictator who gets to decide when and where to hurt someone. Plus, as should be obvious, it is does not lead to well motivated and loyal employees.
Look, I am the least PC guy on the planet and I make lots of mistakes, particularly in this area over the years, but being non-PC is not a license for rudeness. Make a constant effort to see the value in others even if you think they are less gifted than you are. First, you may be wrong and they could be the smartest and best employee ever if motivated. Secondly, after all, it is just the decent thing to do. It will keep your Karma clean.
Posted by Herb Kay on Thursday, June 05, 2008
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